...and eat ice cream. Even though her tummy hates it. We have had two good days since that last, horrible night. James has come straight home and we've done his math homework (Oh how I hate new terms like input and output and realizing how very little I know about algebra.). He has a couple of (sounds like they will be) good friends and hasn't really complained. When I tell him his friend John is in school a full hour ahead of him (due to the time change) it makes him happy. He hasn't yet realized that John is also out of school a full hour ahead of him but that's okay, for now.
Tonight it was a trip to the ice cream parlour and a visit to Blockbuster Video. James has been dying to see Hancock.
How come none of you Texans told me how troublesome it is to get plates down here and a driver's license? Good golly lolly... But, we officially have Texas plates on the car and I will go back (it pays to read the front of the phone book before you waste your time) tomorrow and get my license. I am hoping to get the Michigan house on the market here in the next week or so. I will be grateful if I can sell it.
Off to tuckle (we've always called it that) James in.
Good night!
Thursday, January 8, 2009
Tuesday, January 6, 2009
Getting rid of guilt
And so it goes. There are wonderfully good days, where James and I play "SingStar" or Wii and laugh and laugh... and then there are days like today. His first day of school went well. I had emailed his teacher with our situation and also asked for her opinion on his day. I got a great response and laudatory comments on how respectful, sweet and well behaved James is. (hugh sigh of relief). When I picked James up, he seconded the great day comments.
We shopped for new gym shoes (Oh my gosh, how I love Academy) and went out to dinner with family. James also (***finally***) got to see the inside of a truck cab because Suzanne's brother is a truck driver.
and...
then...
We came home. As he was readying for bed (too late for my taste) he "realized" he still had homework. How does one "realize" they still have homework after answering their mother to the negative all afternoon?? Then came the meltdown, while I was trying to help him. Everything from the day was horrible, he hates the school, he misses everyone one, no he hates it up in Michigan too and doesn't want to "break any more hearts", and on and on. Sobbing little mess of a boy, scooped up in Mama's arms. I hushed away as much of the hurt as I could. I realize, on the sane side, that this is the result of being up too late last night, missing his daddy, and not understanding homework in a brand new school. The paranoid, "looking for signs" side of me worries that he is ruled by guilt (like his daddy) and that there is nothing I can do to change/stop/alter that. I have talked with family up in Michigan and family down here about not saying even the most innocuous little thing that might make him feel guilty. Tonight, even, he apologized and apologized and on and on...until I hushed him to sleep with assurances that it was I who took care of him and not the opposite. My broken little boy is now asleep.
This too, shall pass... I only hope it soon becomes less and less and that this was the right thing to do. I have missed you, my little voices of reason and assurance.
We shopped for new gym shoes (Oh my gosh, how I love Academy) and went out to dinner with family. James also (***finally***) got to see the inside of a truck cab because Suzanne's brother is a truck driver.
and...
then...
We came home. As he was readying for bed (too late for my taste) he "realized" he still had homework. How does one "realize" they still have homework after answering their mother to the negative all afternoon?? Then came the meltdown, while I was trying to help him. Everything from the day was horrible, he hates the school, he misses everyone one, no he hates it up in Michigan too and doesn't want to "break any more hearts", and on and on. Sobbing little mess of a boy, scooped up in Mama's arms. I hushed away as much of the hurt as I could. I realize, on the sane side, that this is the result of being up too late last night, missing his daddy, and not understanding homework in a brand new school. The paranoid, "looking for signs" side of me worries that he is ruled by guilt (like his daddy) and that there is nothing I can do to change/stop/alter that. I have talked with family up in Michigan and family down here about not saying even the most innocuous little thing that might make him feel guilty. Tonight, even, he apologized and apologized and on and on...until I hushed him to sleep with assurances that it was I who took care of him and not the opposite. My broken little boy is now asleep.
This too, shall pass... I only hope it soon becomes less and less and that this was the right thing to do. I have missed you, my little voices of reason and assurance.
Monday, January 5, 2009
The New Normal
A picture of New Year's hilarity with the children.
James with his best friend, John, and his cousin Maddie (at back right) with her friend.Here we are. The first day here in Texas, with just James and I. Nicole took off yesterday after spending 1 more day than they had planned. It is very hard to see your (gosh, she was just a newborn yesterday) daughter go 1400 miles away. She will be okay though.
James was lucky in that his best friend also made it down for the trip, along with Nicole's boyfriend. John is just this adorable little boy who has been dealt a rough hand in life and yet manages to be sweet. I think it helped James with the transisition to have a friend down. Today he registers for a school start tomorrow. He's scared, but I have my fingers crossed that he'll be okay.
There are still so many things to do and not so very much time to do them in. I just want to be "settled". But we all know that that can take years.
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