Every day I drive my son to school. The bus picks up right outside our house, and he does take it home, but he likes for me to drive him in the morning. I also admit to feeling better, having those last few cozy minutes with him. And watching him run from the car to the school. It eases my mind; he is safe. The car (ahem) I drive him to school in is an obnoxious vehicle. It really is. But it was cheap. Because we paid it off for my father when he got stuck with it in the divorce. So...in reality, we were "helping out" when we bought the loaded up (Leather seats, XM, power, moon roof, you name it, it has it) Yukon XL. I know...I know...we are awful, and it guzzles gas, and practically burps it right back at you but the Pacifica lease was up....and it was so darned cheap for a 2 year old vehicle, that we knew the owner of. That's my excuse (poor as it may be) and I'm sticking to it.
My son calls the heated leather seats "butt warmers". If you have never experienced heated seats it is a little disconcerting at first (think "oh my gosh, I feel like I have peed my pants) and then soon becomes heaven. Especially if you have arthritis in your back, frequent back pain or sciatica. In the cold weather we will jump in the car and my son will shout, "Butt Warmers!!!" and everyone hits their button. Well today was the first day, this school year, that he shouted "butt warmers!" and he made me smile. Even though I dread the cold weather, am miserable when there is no sun...and wonder most days how I will make it through the winter and the holidays without Leonard. I appreciate my son, and his cheerful laughter with his friends outside this afternoon. I appreciate that my daughter's best girlfriend is here with us this weekend and that they ran out to the store for me (to replace the rotten potatoes that I was going to use in the stew...but that's another post in itself seeing as I just bought them)...and I know she will make my daughter smile and not yell at me for all of the wrongdoings I have done to her in her 17 years. And all is "normal"...whatever normal is going to be. I am savoring this brief moment of not being tormented, and I hope it lasts a little while.
And...the bracelets that I mentioned a week ago? They arrived today, in time for the benefit tomorrow night. Wow is rush shipping ever expensive. But they are beautiful. And all the neighbors wanted one. I have two on as I type this. One to wear and one to give away. To share the memory of the delightful, caring, and generous man that I was so lucky to be with.
***Additionally**** If anyone would like a bracelet please email me and I can get one to you. It's what I want to do.