I start to think that I will never be rid of this headache. It has moved in and taken over. Bleh...
Thank you so much for asking-the cosmetology presentation went well. There were 3 40 minute sessions. The kids were, for the most part polite. I basically talked about the hours you need to graduate from cosmetology school, the state level testing, and continuing education for specialization (think makeup artistry, long hair styling, hair weaving). I then asked if there were any questions. Of course, they wanted to know if I ever screwed up really badly. Yes I did, but it was in cosmetology school and it was up to my instructor to ask the woman if her hair had been chemically processed at any time before the relaxer we were about to put in. (yes, her hair fell out. Yes the school gave her free scalp treatments. Whew for them that they have all clients sign a release form). I felt sufficiently awful. Then it turned to coloring/cutting/makeup tips. Yaay for career day. Then it turned to a discussion on Jay Manuel.
Life this week is horribly hard. Today was conferences for both my son and my daughter. My son's went well. He is doing good and he is behaving. My daughter's conferences had a horrible set up. Teachers positioned willy nilly with placards throughout the gym. Parents who wanted to spend 30 minutes talking with one teacher about the wonder that is their child, while I waited-head pounding threats the whole time-and waited, and waited. I talked to 4 of her teachers and then gave up. It is a long drive and I was fearful of where my mood was headed.
Each day is a very real reminder of how much I want him. How much I need him...how hard it is to miss someone every day. He, his face, his hands the last time I saw them, are always there. It is so odd how one can just exist. How long can one do that for?
Today, at about 3:30 a blue truck (the exact same color as his) pulled into the drive. My heart skipped a beat...and then I remembered, for the 3,459,324th time...that it will not/will never be him.