Saturday, December 29, 2007

It is now 2:25 AM, I'm not tired...

And Sundry has a meme type thing up that looks like it will tax my feeble brain. I have never done a meme or answered a question type thing, with the exception of my goofy Myspace page that I did at the urging of my daughter so here goes:

1. What did you do in 2007 that you’d never done before?
I buried my best friend, my love, my life.

2. Did you keep your new year’s resolutions, and will you make more for next year?
I don't usually make resolutions, because I am horrible with keeping up with the responsibilities I have and I would end up hating myself.

3. Did anyone close to you give birth?
she was not close to me at the time, but my father's girlfriend's daughter had a baby boy in January

4. Did anyone close to you die?
The person who matters most to me did...only I still don't really believe it

5. What countries did you visit?
Canada, over Memorial Day Weekend with my husband and kids. His aunt has a place up there

6. What would you like to have in 2008 that you lacked in 2007?
Nothing, really. The one thing I want I cannot have and I guess 2008 will be spent in coming to terms with that.

7. What dates from 2007 will remain etched upon your memory, and why? August 26th is the day life as I knew it ended and December 18th is the day I almost lost my daughter.

8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?
Making it through the last 4 months. I did not think I would survive and many times thought about not surviving.

9. What was your biggest failure? Not being able to save my husband

10. Did you suffer illness or injury?
For once, no

11. What was the best thing you bought? The Yukon XL. That sounds totally consumerish but it was a dream of my husband's and I am glad we got one.

12. Whose behavior merited celebration?
So many, many people. The friends who have listened to me without trying to "fix" the friends I have made on the internet, with their messages of caring and the packages and letters they have sent.

13. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?
My mother in law, who somehow blames me... Whose sometimes two-face behavior hurts more than I try to let on.

14. Where did most of your money go? Bills

5. What did you get really, really, really excited about?
It is odd that I can't think of one single thing...

16. What song will always remind you of 2007? How to Save a Life

17. Compared to this time last year, are you:
 a) happier or sadder? Much much sadder 
b) thinner or fatter? 
Much,much thinner c) richer or poorer? Much,much richer in terms of finances and poorer in all the things that matter

18. What do you wish you’d done more of? Loving my husband and my life

19. What do you wish you’d done less of?
 Petty disagreements with my husband

20. How did you spend Christmas?
I picked up my daughter Christmas Eve from the hospital (yay) and spent Christmas morning with my mom and grandma and Christmas night with my dad and his girl friend.

21. Did you fall in love in 2007?

22. What was your favorite TV program?
I will shamelessly (*blush*) say America's Next Top Model... I can't help it, but I'm totally done with it after they picked Saleisha...

23. Do you hate anyone now that you didn’t hate this time last year?
Hate is a very strong word.

24. What was the best book you read? Rhett Butler's People, or it could have been Steven Colbert's I am America (and you can too). Very very funny.

25. What was your greatest musical discovery?
The Killers

26. What did you want and get? There is nothing...really

27. What did you want and not get?
A long and beautiful future with the one person who really knew and loved me.

28. What was your favorite film of this year? I am stunned to say Transformers

29. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?
Aargh... I turned 37 and I spent it with my husband and kids.

30. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
If I could have woken up on Christmas morning in my husband's arms

31. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2007? If it's clean, put it on.

32. What kept you sane? My father, his girlfriend, my children, this blog and the friends I have made here and other spots, Debbie, Suzanne a ton of people have helped me.

33. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?
Johnny Depp

34. What political issue stirred you the most?
The right of a person to pick whomever they choose to spend their life with, and for those unions to be recognized.

35. Who did you miss?
Leonard...always Leonard

36. Who was the best new person you met?
That's a really, really tough one because, this year, there are so many. But I'm going to go with Rachael.

37. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2007.
Never take your life for granted... no matter how mundane or unfulfilling it may seem.

38. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year. Where did I go wrong, I lost a friend Somewhere along in the bitterness And I would have stayed up with you all night Had I known how to save a life


Alicia said...

Ugh... I don't think I could have done this meme 4 months after Nick died. I still don't want to do it, because I think many of my answers would be the same as yours.

I'm in awe of you.

Marsha said...

I think I am going to steal this from you. I do hope this new year brings you some peace.

Ronni said...

A lot of my answers would be the same, too.

I have faith that it will get better for both of us.

I usually have faith in the morning. It's late at night that is bad.

Ortizzle said...

I would have wiped half the questions off of this meme list. I think there are times when that is a fair and necessary thing to do.

You are doing so amazingly well, and this is probably hard for you to believe right now, but in retrospect it will be clear. And it does get better. It just takes longer than it should and never happens in the way you might imagine.

I am so glad your daughter is well and back home. On reading through previous posts, it seems you had a nice Christmas. That gave me a warm glow.

Take care, dear. And don't forget the first corollary to your fashion concept (which I share with you), "If it's clean, put it on." What, you don't remember? O.K., here you are: "If it's not on the floor, you can also put it on!" :-))

The girl left behind said...

I echo the others; you were very strong to do this. On #15, I hear you. I remember the first time I was really excited about ANYTHING after my sweetie passed. It seemed like a miracle; I hadn't felt that way in so very long.

Jeanette said...

Laura My heart breaks to realize that you are blaming yourself for what happened to your husband. I can't begin to understand because I haven't walked in your shoes but I'm sure that Leonard would not blame you or want you blaming yourself. This next year will be a year of healing for you and you will find comfort in your children and the passage of time. I am praying for you. Being a fellow Michigander please know if there is ever anything I can do for you feel free to email me!
P.S. That little 3-month old girl I talked about on my blog was in the hospital where I work and I was able to keep track of how she was doing. I'm glad to say that physically she recovered well. Unfortunately there is a slight bit of brain damage from being beaten. I hope her "father" gets what's coming to him.

Laurie said...

Hi Laura,

Just stopping by tonight to let you know I am thinking about you and praying for all of you. I hope Nicole is feeling better with every day that passes and that you all feel some good peace in your home. I truly feel that 2008 will be a kinder year for so many.

Love, Laurie in Ca.

Tessie said...

Laura, my most sincere hope is that this year is a good year for you.

It shows what amazing character you have that you are able to visit blogs like mine, chock full of unimportant problems.

I look forward to reading more from you in 2008.

mommydawg said...

Hi Laura, I just saw your post on Sundry and checked out your blog which is very good. I'm another young widow like yourself and your meme really reflects a lot the same sentiments as mine. It's not easy. Let's hope we both find some kind of peace with our situations sooner than later...